A.k.a. The last weeks. :)
16.06, Mon (Day 73)
Time: 0631 - very dark. At the JL's pondok.
Hmm... I don't know what to write; just felt like coming out. I think we're having an early breakfast today.
***
Pertandingan kawad's just over - not to say I am disappointed; its more to a bittersweet kinda feeling. One thing for sure - everybody knows Alpha is the best.
But unfortunately, we got 2nd place (1st place went to Bravo) - by 5 marks. We forgot to do a closing hormat, a cap fell and 2 people had to tie their shoelaces. I guess all this contributed to our results, but I don't blame them.
Our OC, Shafiq, got OC terbaik and Joyce got kawad individu terbaik. Congrats! =)
Honestly, I was on the verge of tears when our JLs talked to us; that its OK to be second, that Alpha will always be the best. Oh God, once they announced the 2nd place, I held back my tears. There's no grudge in my heart - its weird. I know we trained hard and did our best. People always complimented Alpha's kawad (especially the wirawatis'; way back when camp just started), so I know that we did not lose to Bravo. =)
Let's do our best for SSP!
[hormat - salute]
[OC terbaik - best OC]
[kawad individu terbaik - best individual march]
Found out that they actually did not cut our marks for the fallen cap and undone shoelaces. The hormat costed us 20 or 30 marks and we were just 5 marks behind Bravo, which means that if we did do the hormat, we would be way in front. But what's over's over. :)
Let me show you some beautiful, bright pictures~ I took these pictures when I thought the sky looked amazing. :)
The stairs to our toilet
No, it isn't that high up, I squatted to capture this picture.
Above Charlie and Delta's dorms
When its quiet and bright like that, it gives off a mysterious vibe, much like the places in Spirited Away when its morning and there are no guests. I find that this camp reminds me a lot about Spirited Away; even the road to the camp looks kinda like the road Chihiro's dad got lost in when they were going to their new house. That's why I like it. :) There's an otherworldly feel to it.
17.06, Tues (Day 74)
Yesterday night, we practiced and did props till about 10pm++; it was kinda fun. Chatted with Vince and Chris and the usual friends - I'm glad to know them better. Played around with paint a little. XD I love painting stuff cuz we paint with fingers and its usually just us, the people I know. The first time we painted together was for Pertandingan Nasyid and that time I barely know Vince and Chris; we didn't even talk. So now that we are friends, I find myself having trouble believing it sometimes.
Oh, its a little to 5 now - woke up before 4 cuz I was freezing. Slept on the floor without a blanket. We cleaned up our dorms last night late into the night and had to creep around cuz the sergeant will be coming up anytime for his rounds.
Borrowed a baju kurung from Fatin Amirah for SSP and she presented me a seriously beautiful baju kurung. Its peach with swirly batik designs; the first thing that comes to my mind when she handed me the dress was "Why didn't she wear it herself...? ;_;". I felt like crying because its so beautiful. And I love wearing baju kurung cuz it makes one looks so beautiful - I love the figure it gives off. It creates a slim silhouette. (And its also cuz I'm fair that I match any baju kurung I wear! XD)
***
(Fatin told me I'm the first one to wear that baju kurung. OAO)
SSP's over... We got... tatata - 2nd place. I guess it was kinda expected. We didn't have a lot of props or music and we didn't use the mic a lot. Our Clifford got best actor though. (We did Dato Bahaman.) But our song was amazing!
Delta won first because their drama was seriously good with the background music, props and everything. Everyone was blown away. Wow, when Leftenan Adnan got hit by the enemy and he tried to fight back even though he's on the verge of death, it was seriously amazing. ._. The guy's acting was so freaking real and the BGM matched it very well. It felt like watching an impactful movie.
But alas, their choir was very shitty (I'm sorry). Its obvious that their choir was bad, and so painfully awkward. There's too few singers too and 2 people were holding mics so they drown out the others' voices and ultimately spoilt the whole choir. ._.
It was unfair for Alpha as we only got to use the stage once, which was on yesterday night, while others were always hogging the stage. We had to migrate to multiple places to practice. But what was advantageous to us was our choir - it was wonderful.
The Komandan was smiling, nodding and singing along to us! I was at the 2nd row, middle person (but the audience can see me clearly cuz the front row people are super short) and I made sure to look at the Komandan. XD Omg I love performing! Now that I think of it, I was completely relaxed on the stage today.
Now we have to rely on our dorms for merits when they have the dorm competition. We did our best!
I guess this was when I really became friends with Vince and Chris. :) If they read that I still couldn't believe we're friends, they're gonna hit me. OTZ At least Vince will.
Everytime we're allowed to wear public outfits (aka normal clothes), I was offered baju kurungs. I only wore normal T-shirt and track pants the first time we're allowed to wear home clothes. I'm thankful~
18.06, Wed (Day 75)
About one more hour 'till we have to go back to the forest. I'm excited for the night activity!! We went into the forest (which is within the camp's compound) about 8 in the morning and came out at about 3.
Basically some of us have to carry ponchos, water canteens and the metal/steel thing they use for cooking. I carried a poncho. The night before, we packed food, plastic, drinks, etc, but it was actually useless. LOL If I'd known better, I would just have packed my bottle and plasters. Then I would have had a super light bag.
I participated in the food hunting mission along with another 4 girls and 5 boys (10 people per company). We'll have a map with bearing and metre information that will lead us to some buah sukuns (which Delta had taken all and then ruined the mission =.=). After that, the JL will give us our ingredients for the cooking challenge.
Our company had to restart several times cuz we got lost - nobody was using the metre-to-steps method we learnt. I couldn't stand it anymore so I asked them to follow my steps cuz I still remembered my metre-to-steps ratio. Luckily, they agreed to follow (I was afraid they wouldn't cuz the CO and some more prominent people is in the group). So in the end, Izzaty, me and a guy holding the compass is the main leader. I got to walk first!
We actually reached our destination, although it was slightly inaccurate (we were short of a few steps -.-). But we won that challenge so its OK. I was glad I spoke up...
There were several challenges/missions/competitions - khemah, mencari makanan, masakan and menyelamat & pertolongan cemas. Each company won one of each and I couldn't help feeling that the JLs deliberately let everyone win. <.<
Went out to search for banana leaves to use as decoration - I used a red marker to draw some swirly (hopefully Malay-ish) design on it. It was quite simple, and putting me to work on art is one of the best things for me to do.
A JL took a picture of me when I was drawing and one with me looking at the camera. XD And I was happy cuz I got praises from several JLs! Cikgu Jue stopped by to chat with me a few times. She said that the design I drew on the leaves has ciri-ciri Sabah dan Sarawak. And I still remembered that suddenly there was a 'bang!' and she covered herself and pretended to be shocked and confused, LOL! And we were like what was happening, what the hell was that and pretended to take cover.
[khemah - tent]
[mencari makanan - food-finding]
[masakan - cooking]
[menyelamat & pertolongan cemas - rescue & first aid]
[ciri-ciri Sabah dan Sarwak - Sabah and Sarawak characteristic]
Honestly I felt that the forest activity (the supposed peak-of-our-training activity) was disappointing - we didn't even go into the forest; it was just at the border, next to the boys' dorm. QAQ I wanted to hike and explore!! I read in others' blog that they really went forest-ing, but we didn't! Why... ;_;
It was actually because some kids' parents 'disallowed' them to join the forest activity for whatever reasons. They had to cancel the overnight plan because of them!! Arghhh!! I suspected that it was the kids themselves that didn't want to go in and then asked their parents to write a letter. =.= Wtf.
19.06, Thurs (Day 76)
It was very disappointing - the supposedly 'masuk hutan' activity. ._. We didn't actually get to explore the forest; all we did was set up camp at the edge of the forest which was just beside the guy dorms. Its not even legitly 'forest' enough!
And then I thought that we will get to hunt for vegetables in the forest for the food hunting mission (that's why they taught us how to identify edible plants, isn't it?) - but we actually just walked about the padang kawad's perimeter.
The night activity... omg. ;_; I don't know to laugh or cry - its not even in the forest at all! All the lights were off and our activity was to walk one round around the lake and identify 6 sounds that they'll make. I want to cry cuz I expected it to be in the forest.
But I want to laugh because of what they did - their sounds were what I'd expected; creepy sounds! We walked in lines of 2 and held the bag in front of us. Some girls were scared and some were excited. It was thrilling for me cuz it feels like an open ghost house!!
I didn't hear the 1st sound but they said it was someone knocking wood on the pondok. The 2nd sound we heard was from the kayak hut; it was like somebody hitting a gong, a kompang and some other materials. That one was kinda creepy. ._. The 3rd sound was from the BJ or something. Creepy and hysterical laughters sounded inside the room (it was freaking exciting. It reminded me of Cikgu Jue somehow. XD) and Thiviya clung on me like her life depended on it. Like seriously, whoever was inside were enjoying themselves a lot.
4th was someone moving the beds violently in the BJ. And then I imagined if I was alone and heard this. Omg. ._. 5th was the sound of someone stirring a spoon in a glass/porcelain cup. We could actually see the JLs sleeping on the grass and we were like "Let's just pretend we can't see them...". The last one I find especially creepy - the sound of someone sharpening knives behind the bamboo plants. ._. Wth...
After we finished, we sat back at the padang kawad in the dark. Chatted with Chris and Vince, until Chris had to line up forward so Vince was beside me. We practically talked until we have to go back to our dorms.
"Some things only happen once; you have to be initiative, like Kelly."
I feel like I got to know them a lot better and closer after yesterday. I had spent my whole 2 months wanting to be friends, while withdrawing myself, but now that we're friends, it felt natural.
Even though sometimes when I think about it, its like a dream. It felt completely ordinary when I chat with them; I'm glad.
[masuk hutan - lit. go inside forest]
You know, since coming into NS, I had had insightful advices thrown at me. I'd always been such a coward, especially when it comes to socializing. But then, miraculously, I met some people that force me into conversations and make sure that I will keep being there. In a way, I'm thankful.
"You're so quiet, its forbidden." "Try saying a bad word at me." "You can say anything that is on your mind." I remembered Vince told me all this. He's kinda that weird person, but they say he can be trusted. What I like about him is that I can just say anything, even offensive stuff (not overly-offensive btw) and he'll still be able to accept it. He's 20 (so we call him uncle) but he looks really young. ._.
20.06, Fri (Day 77)
Today was uneventful - went through 2 ceramahs. Yesterday, we were separated into our KN classes to play games in the Dewan Makan. Its more like completing missions actually.
In the 3rd mission, we had to form a human barrier to protect our 'country' and a few people has to be in the middle to complete the mission, which is to create your country's treasure. Speckys had to take off their specs. ;_; I was so blur when I first took it out, but luckily I can still see alright.
The barrier game was intense - JLs tried to invade our country by barging into the barrier and we have to fight back. Later on, people from other KN classes started to be the invaders. The whole Dewan Makan was a human barrier mess.
The boys were rough when they play this game - I don't think I'd play a game this rough. ._. Comat charged into our barrier and collided with half of my body; hurting my left hand and knee in the process. There's a bruise on my left knew now. Fell once while playing this game when another guy charged in. -.-
[ceramah - talk/discourse/lecture]
I'll show you some pictures I took~
Waiting for roll call
22.06, Sun (Day 79)
Our flag got sabotaged yesterday night - its missing now. It happened during our dance practice. Some Alpha members were still in the Dewan Makan, but nobody saw who took it. I don't think the people charging their phones near the flag stand cannot see lo!
All of us were made to search for the flag throughout the entire camp premise; but it couldn't be found. We even looked in the drains, garbage bins and above the plaster ceilings.
Cikgu Rizal was so mad - we'd never seen him this angry before. This was the first time someone stole a company's flag, according to a JL. But obviously, nobody spoke up.
We need the flag for a lot of things - to march into the padang kawad, etc. How are we going to graduate without a flag? During our graduation perbarisan, we won't have a flag to wave; there'll just be blue, yellow and green.
***
Came up to the dorm just now and tried on the clothes Mummy brought from home. We're doing a Malay dance and Agogo dance (some '60s dance). For the Agogo dance, we have to wear block colours and a puffy skirt.
Wore the clothes, put on some music and danced around the room for about 30 mins. LOL I was alone. =D
[perbarisan - march]
My Agogo dance costume
Skirt borrowed from Ah Ying
Pity that I don't have a picture of me wearing it (because we weren't allowed handphones) - people said I looked cute and Barbie-ish. >.<
24.06, Tues (Day 81)
Dance practice started recently and I had had 2 partners before I ended up with one, which means I had had 3 partners. The first partner I got (Apit), our communication wasn't good in the beginning and I'd thought of changing, but later our communication got better, so it was OK.
After that, Cikgu Milah said she only need people with slim bodies to fit the baju kebaya, so some people were taken off and partners rearranged. I got Azli, a tall guy that is quite OK. It was easy to talk to him because he has a soft face.
Today, Cikgu Milah asked the girls to dance, then the boys. She then rearranged our positions and matched us with a new partner. I got Shafiq, wira's OC. He's the apple of a lot of girls' eyes and I was shocked when I got paired with him since there are taller guys (I'm one of the taller girls). Once, Vince joked about me being paired with Shafiq when I told him about Apit; so we looked at each other and couldn't believe it actually happened.
He's OK, I guess. It was a little awkward at first cuz he was shy, but then I opened up myself first, so now he's more open. We do funny things while dancing.
When people knew that my partner is Shafiq, they kept congratulating me and said that I profited. ~.~ Honestly, I'm one of the girls that does not look at him, so I don't spend my time being distracted while dancing. More like, luckily I do not fancy him, if not I'll be super nervous! XD
Our position is on the stage; you could say the main dancer. I still remembered Cikgu Milah said to Shafiq, "Kau kena pandai menari kerana dia pandai menari," when I got paired with him. I'm flattered, honestly, that Cikgu Milah thinks my dancing is good. I'll do my best!
Oh, and the Agogo dance, omg its so embarrassing! OTZ We girls have to act like we are vain and proud, ugh omg. *covers face* I cannot... I'll laugh and cover my face! D= I chose back Shafiq to be my partner - I was so afraid some other girls will take him. He's the perfect dance partner for me, so it must be him only! XD
["Kau kena pandai menari kerana dia pandai menari." - "You have to be good in dancing because she's good in dancing."]
Pictures of the stage set-up:
This was actually taken a day after our Malay dance.
The theme for our batch was '60s and was titled 'Night of a Thousand Memories'.
It was seriously awkward and weird to wear such a short skirt while talking to boys. OTZ I was a bit scared when I went over to my friends (Christians). "I feel awkward..." "You shouldn't; you look good," Vince answered. Luckily they had the decency to not press onto the subject or stare. Then I slowly started to feel comfortable.
The dance was awesome - I was not scared like I'd expected. I was on the stage, front row, with Shafiq and we just danced randomly. I had fun! He's practically my first real dance partner (kindie does not count). It was a new experience, doing dance steps from the '60s and I actually danced (there were no choreography). For the first time, I actually just danced. And not just any dance; it was a flirty dance. ._.
From Panjang's FB:
iamnotreadydammit
26.06, Thurs (Day 83)
Tomorrow is the day we leave; I still can't believe it. I wanna stay here longer and keep doing what we do. I want 'My partner is Shafiq' instead of 'My partner was Shafiq'.
Our performance was a success - it was the best we've done. I was one of the 4 on stage, the middle ones with Joyce. I wore a kebaya for the first time; it was yellow with a pink glitterish skirt. It was a little big on me, but it looked fabulous. I actually wanted the red kebaya at first (on stage we've got red and yellow kebayas) but Joyce & Ping took it - and later I realized the yellow looks better and it suits me very well.
Cikgu Milah was so proud of our performance! She had a video and she bluetooth-ed it to us. Luckily I got the yellow kebaya because the red kebayas kinda camouflaged into the background. ._.
Before our entrance~
There's one thing I apparently noticed in pictures recently; people's facial features
are really obvious in pictures, and my face looks really simple and clean. ._.
Our last day:
I don't wanna be mean or anything, but if you see how some people cry, you'd feel like laughing instead. :)
Packing the night before
Emptying the locker
Izzaty (our CO)
My (literally) bag of snacks
It actually goes halfway up the bag.
Finished! (I had too much baggage; more than I could carry. ;_;)
Dewan Makan, bags everywhere
Alpha's mass farewell
Sabahans going to the airport
My index number brother (BL205) cried like there's no tomorrow.
Omg I really pity him. Chris and I actually talked about his crying yesterday during badminton. ._.
Padang kawad, waiting for parents' arrival
From front: Cikgu Nik, Cikgu Jue and mysterious canteen lady
Nor and I
She was so sad when I had to leave (cuz we were really close) that I teared a little. We gave each other a cheek kiss before I left. I told her I'll go to Sarawak to see her someday (and to all my Sarawakian friends)! My OC was crying when she hugged me... I wasn't really that close to her, so I was surprised.
I then asked sis to help me with my baggage and Joshua came and helped too. O.O I told him to take the small bags but he wanted to take the luggage instead. He pulled my luggage (+ a bag on top of the luggage) to mom's car. So that makes him the 2nd guy my mom knows from camp (the first one being Vince). Wow, what a gentleman. I cannot. Please leh - I'd never had such initiative friends until I met all of them!! QAQ I want to cry omg. /internal grateful tears/
And that's the end of my PLKN diary entries! And in case you're wondering who won...
ALPHA WON!!!
OK la, it was kinda obvious from the start. But nevertheless, it was a priceless victory. :) Being in a winning team gives you a different experience (being in any other team will give you a different experience). Sometimes I think back to my first day, when I was with Kelly (the only 2 unregistered enlistees), and the teacher showed 2 index cards and I was like hmm... I like blue, but recently I started to like red, so I'll just take it, and I took the red index card and thus begun my journey in Alpha. It made me realize I could very well had been in Bravo if I had not taken the red index card first - it was a very close bet.
Yup, and we got back our flag in the end - someone left it at the Charlie-Delta wirawati stairs and we found it. There was a note inside; it was aimed at Delta (Delta was our super-enemy) and said how shit Delta was, but it could very well be written by Delta members trying to frame Charlie. I heard that Delta wira's OC confessed that it was his doings. I have nothing against Delta sincerely, just that sometimes they could try to be a little bit more happy for others - it doesn't hurt. (Joshua is in Delta and we are fine.) But nevermind, in the end we got our fairytale ending.
Or at least, PLKN was my fairytale. I did things I thought I never could, wrote 'For the first time, I...' countless times and met people I couldn't even believe existed. It was somewhat of a miracle for me. I am just so thankful that I got enlisted, even though at first I hated the government for choosing me (I was in a 50-50 mood when I first got there). Maybe not everyone will have the same experience as me, thus resulting in each individual endings and opinions, but I know that I LOVE IT A LOT.
